Bill Irwin. The blind man that walked the entire length of the Appalachian Trail with only a guide dog and a deep faith in God who became a power of example for not just the hiking community, but anyone searching for a modern day example of a miracle.
Bill Bryson. The scourge of the hiking community who blundered his way along with an hopelessly overwieght sidekick for a few hundred miles before skipping ahead, whereupon his thru-hike fragmented into a few wide-spaced day hikes, who never even saw Katahdin.
Who faced the most challange? Who kept thier convictions? Who do we all look up to? Who’s the better Bill? Bryson-Irwin. Let’s see how they compare.
HIKING PARTNER:
Irwin: A Dog and a God.
Bryson: Katz
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
WAS HANDICAPPED BY:
Irwin: Loss of vision
Bryson: Contempt of vision
ADVANTAGE: Tie
MILES HIKED:
Irwin: 2,160
Bryson: 870
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
NUMBERED IN MILLIONS:
Irwin: Lives his story touched
Bryson: Books he sold
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
FOUND HUMOR IN:
Irwin: The happiness of others
Bryson: The misery of others
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
MOMENT OF TREPIDATION:
Irwin: His seeing eye dog running away
Bryson: Watching Katz climb into the top bunk
ADVANTAGE: Bryson
THE BIGGER MESS:
Irwin: He was discriminated against in a restaurant when he brought his dog in
Bryson: Katz flirting with a married woman
ADVANTAGE: Bryson
LOOKED TO:
Irwin: God for guidance
Bryson: Katz for material
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
ONE WORD USED TO DESCRIBE HIKE:
Irwin: Heaven
Bryson: Hell
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
CONSIDERED BY OTHER THRU-HIKERS TO BE:
Irwin: An inspirational trail legend
Bryson: A yellow-blazing S.O.B.
ADVANTAGE: Irwin
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Irwin: Faith in God can accomplish the miraculous
Bryson: Don’t let Katz carry your food
ADVANTAGE: Tie: morals are relative.
So there you have it. In a landslide victory, our most favorite Bill is-Bill Irwin. But don’t give up, Bryson, cause a sequel will doubtlessly sell millions more! Until next time, this is Kineo Kid reminding you that I’m not one to gripe, because I haven’t even hiked 200 consecutive miles.
Kineo Kid
